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The Comeback
Assalamualaikum. Nampaknya saya membuat kemunculan setelah tenggelam hampir 4 bulan. Literally tenggelam, bukan aku pergi scuba diving dan hanya muncul ke permukaan setelah 4 bulan. Atau aku tersadai di persada lautan selama 4 bulan =__= Secara umumnya dah 4 bulan aku tak mengarang apa-apa, cuma ada la sebulan sekali aku post gambar yang merepek-repek itu hanyalah untuk kurangkan rasa bersalah setelah tak post langsung selama berbulan-bulan. Dan gambar yang terakhir aku post pun adalah sebulan yang lalu.
Four months vanishing
Sometimes i dont know what i want, sometimes i dont know what im chasing for , sometimes i dont know what goes around me and sometimes i dont know what life means. Where i have been? To be honest, i dont know. It feels like i’ve lost myself too. Life if like on rocky mountain, you go up and down and the world just keep rotating and you keep chasing because you don’t want to be left behind. No one does. And the past four months is just alot to deal with. So many things happen. The happiness, the resentment and all the remorse. Life is always like that, sometimes i really hate it but when thinking about mortality, i’m really living my life and on the second thought, i am happy. I love and hate my life with equal measure. But after all, we just got one life to live. All the memories is worth to give a shot.
Looking up in the clouds
People always tell us what to do, how to handle things. But it’s just so hard to presumed. Really intrusive when everything is just in own hands. Even sometimes what we want is not within our reach. But atleast we can always hope. People always see me in just one direction, with their tedious thoughts. I see things differently from most eyes. I am not what other people always expected. I perceive things what most people cant. And i see the world differently, im not your average kid, the way i think varies. And when i react on certain things, that does not always reflect my whole personality. Other people can be diabolic and never learn to accept the hard truth about themselves. Can’t be intimidated. I am different and you will never get me.
Opening up possibilities
Truthfully, i am scared. The world of tomorrow is just unknown and runic. What would it be 30 years from now? Not just we’re getting old but the world has changed too. It is a question that a man is uncertain. Sometimes i dont want to grow old, to be an adult. Too much burden and commitment and if anything goes wrong, in a split second the world could be tearing apart. I don’t think i am ready for all that, but that is exactly what i have to face. It is a cycle of life. Make mistakes, wrong decision, learnt to accept and adapt to move forward. Now when we’re 20s, there’s just college problems and teenage drama but as we getting older, the perspective will become broader. For now, i am going into my final semester to complete my diploma. I am pretty sure it’s going to get ugly and another rough memories will come to embrace. But, i will put myself together and no matter what happen i shall move forward. As i said, i have a different looking glass and i see the world differently. It is my life, and i face the world with my own peril.
